Perhaps It's the Idea of My Desk

As a quasi-academic, I feel that it's my duty to have a desk. This desk has all the necessary qualities that the desk of an academic ought to have; it's old, it's heavy, it's worn. Perhaps this desk is a bit, shall I say, underutilized. I have my computer on it (when it's not being used). There are a few books on it (academic books, which I read while not at the desk), and there are various pens and utensils (all legal and registered, I assure you) scattered about the work surface. But perhaps the most unique property that my desk possesses is the black hole that can be found somewhere above the drawers and below the envelope-sized compartments. There lies a black hole whose force is so great that it sucks all productivity and work ethic out of whoever sits near it. I cannot locate, therefore I cannot eliminate the source of said hole. Thus all of my ambition and plans disappears once I take my place at the swivelly chair in front of said desk.

And yet, each and every day, I take a seat at the desk. I place a mug of coffee next to the computer, I open up my laptop computer, and I start.....not doing work! It's that simple. I do all of things that one does when preparing to do work, but I then commence to do no work whatsoever. I cannot tell you what I do, for it eludes even me. At the time, it seems satisfying and productive. I appear busy and immersed, because I am! But my immersion is into something entirely counterproductive. It is as if I cleared several hours of my schedule in order to obliterate and reverse past hours of productivity. Nietzsche once wrote (roughly) "and if you gaze into the abyss, the abyss gazes into you". Such is true of my desk. But if the story of science has taught me one thing, it's that every great force that is granted a seat of absolute, unchanging power and authority, is eventually shown to hold only relative power. The atom was unseated by quarks, leptons, and so on. The speed of light proved to be not quite the fastest thing out there. Can my desk's seemingly unrelenting reign of productivity consumption be defeated by another, heretofore unknown force? I would never dare posit any certainty in my reply (I have learned enough to know better, and known enough to learn better, for that matter). But I shall say it is likely. It is likely that my desk's power can be bested by some other force, perhaps one that, like most newly discovered scientific powerhouse entities, has been here all along. I like to call that theoretical force "my resolve". An equation proving its existence will follow, watch the academic journals.